The thing about movies like “50 Shades of Grey” is that it’s not something you see alone in the theaters. Not just because you’d look like a real weirdo, but because the fun is going in a group, girls or boys, and occasionally taking breaks from looking at the screen to look at the people around you. They’re gasping, their eyebrows are raised, they look horrified, gleeful and evil. That has to be why so many people saw that (pretty dreadful) movie in theaters. Because it’s definitely not like the movie’s any good.
“50 Shades of Grey” is almost exactly what you expect. It does for movies what the books it’s based on do for literature: nothing (at least in terms of advancement). The soundtrack is good enough, but everything else is downright horrible. The script is so clichéd it feels like a joke — why, why did they need to say, “Laters, baby,” even once, let alone repeatedly? The story just wasn’t there, or at least didn’t make any sense.
But it was at least fun. And really, what more could we hope for with this movie?
“50 Shades of Grey” was definitely at its worst when it was boring, because then it had nothing else to offer. The acting was okay — it was really about their bodies more than anything. And when it comes to this movie, who cares about the cinematography, really?
While watching, I found myself wondering what this movie does for BDSM and the sexual topics it pretends to discuss. I think the biggest point this movie makes is that, normal or not, the majority of people are at least interested, probably fascinated. Which isn’t something to totally discount. It’s important to start a conversation, and 50 Shades sure as hell does that. It alerted people far and wide that BDSM exists and is there. But what else?
Exempting that, when it comes to actually discussing the topic of BDSM, the movie is basically useless — despite the fact that BDSM is basically all that the movie is even about. When it came time for me to write this column, I didn’t have anything to say really about BDSM, because I still barely know or get anything about it — and though there was (almost literally) nothing else to the movie, there doesn’t seem to be much to say about it. Talking about BDSM then has to be it’s own thing, a separate topic for another time — because BDSM’s place in “50 Shades of Grey” is almost decorative. There isn’t enough emotional depth (or structured plotline) in the movie for any topic to be broached properly — this isn’t like the movie Secretary, which actually explores BDSM, this is 50 Shades.
It’s not made to engage you, but to entertain you. And for its purpose, it does an okay job. And the sex does the rest.
BY ANONYMOUS
Contributing writer